Several days in the life

Okay, it's been a while, and I have a lot to say (lucky you), so we will take this day by day:

FRIDAY

Friday night was quesadilla night. We knew Jake and Jake were going to make Mexican food, and so we were all really excited, because Mexican food is really not a big thing here. There is a sign on Cornmarket street that honestly says: “OXFORD'S BEST BURRITO” followed by “OK, if we're being honest, it's Oxford's only burrito..” and we have heard a British woman refer to quesadillas as “Kway-suh-dill-uhs.” Anyway, now we have discovered why Mexican food is not such a hit. I'm not sure where they got this “Mexican” food, but I don't think it was Mexico. Actually, I'm being too harsh. The quesadillas themselves were excellent; the main problem was the salsa. It was extremely sweet/weird/tasted like ketchup. We formed a theory that if we put the salsa in a ketchup bottle, no one would be able to tell. Annie and I later tested this hypothesis by eating it with fries, but it turned out to be untrue. It was gross. So basically this salsa is good for NOTHING.

In protest, we (meaning I) plan to start a salsa revolution, protesting the lack of quality salsa and Mexican food in general. We will not accept these low standards. Our first move is to purchase all the “salsa” at Tesco and dump it into the Thames, probably disguised as conquistadors.

SATURDAY

On Saturday, we decided to culture ourselves, so we went to the Ashmolean museum. Bonus: it is free! Drawback: upon arriving, the little museum guys informed us that backpacks had to be worn on the front. We talked to Sam about this later, and he told us it was probably a trick they played on dumb Americans. Apparently, even after wearing backpacks our whole lives, they think that we will forget they are there and make sudden movements that will knock the paintings off the walls. I really don't know. All I know is that it was extremely uncomfortable. And made you feel like you were pregnant/Santa Claus. And if you sneakily swung your backpack around to your back (Jake tried this) a little museum man would pop out of nowhere and tell you to put it back on your front. Despite this, the Ashmolean was a really cool museum, and I was glad we went. My only regret is that I did not take pictures of everyone with their backpack on their front. I missed out on so much potential blackmail. 

This is an example of the excellent culture in the Ashmolean. 

In case you can't tell, it is a unicorn fighting a griffen.

SUNDAY

Sunday was the PACKERS/BEARS CHAMPIONSHIP GAME! But Lisa, you say, how could you enjoy such an American experience in a land where they think football involves soccer balls? Pubs, that is how. About 5 of us in the program (mostly Bears fans) went to the pub and got to watch the game. It was great, because they played really weird British commercials. Also, the “commentators” of the game were, I kid you not, a British sports analyst, an American basketball coach, and a third string quarterback that at some point in his career was beat out by Jay Cutler, causing him to make many remarks on Cutler's “rookie mistakes.” I figure, with such low standards, I could be a football commentator here. I would fulfill two roles: token American and token female reporter. Anyway, since the PACKERS WON I get to watch the Superbowl in a pub starting at 12:30PM. I'm pumped. 

Annie (Bears fan) and I had an intense rivalry:

MONDAY

Monday Nicole and I joined the Oxford University College Choir. It was pretty awesome, because we got to sing some German stuff and get called “so-pRAW-nos” instead of “so-pRAN-nos.” Much more dignified.

TUESDAY

Tuesday was the British night that Sam made us have in response to American night. The rules were, similar to American night, that we all had to talk in British accents and talk about how great Britain was. Turns out my British accent isn't so hot. I mostly stuck to British phrases from P. G. Wodehouse that no one actually says, like “Tally Ho!” and “What, what!” and “Right-o!” But then I ran out of those and had to regress to “Wingardium Leviosa.” Jake was definitely the best at it. He could also do cockney, Dick Van Dike in Mary Poppins, and the Beatles. It was great. I am not looking forward to doing it again.

WEDNESDAY

This day was really boring for blogging purposes, because I basically read/wrote all day. I actually do that a lot, although you might not get that impression. My only cool accomplishment was that I have figured out how to truly appreciate tea-time: eat all the cookies ("biscuits") and put milk in my tea cup. 

I DON'T REMEMBER WHICH DAY

Okay, okay, one more exciting thing: Some British guy asked me for directions! I think he was, as they say here, a “fresher,” but I now officially look like I know what I'm doing. I had no idea where he was trying to go. It was great.

Note to self: take more pictures.

First is the worst, second is the best

It's BLOG TIMEEEE! Good thing too, because I have like a million things to update y'all on.
First thing's first. I went to London with the program on Saturday, the highlight of this trip being that I got to eat at the only Chipotle in the UK. No, seriously, it was really fun and included:

• Getting to take my picture with the royal guard

• Climbing up the Monument to the Great Fire London, which has about a million steps (and/or 311), but that's not as many as St. Paul's, so it was basically a breeze. I even got a  free certificate to prove that I am tough/awesome!

The ascent: 

Jen and I with our certificat, joyous that we made it:

• Speaking of St. Paul's, we got to go to the Evensong service there. We got to sit right next to the choir and it was absolutely amazing.

• Went to Trafalgar Square, so of course a lion picture was required

 

• Visited the National Gallery to become cultured
• Walked a lot.  Our tour guide was an Australian man who works for SCIO, and his goal seemed to be to lure as many students to their death as possible. He mainly did this by crossing streets when there was a clear "no walk" sign, leading countless students to follow him blindly, and almost get hit by buses from the wrong direction. 

 In other news:

My English Complaint: 

These English buildings are old and great, but they don't have the best central heating systems. Case study #1: The bathroom in Crick. As far as I can tell, the only source of heat in the freezing bathroom is the heated towel rack, which, don't get me wrong, is a great idea in iteself, but does not exactly generate enough heat to fill a bathroom.
UPDATE: I have just confirmed that the heated towel rack IS the only source of heat in the bathroom. Awesome.

New English Words:

Plonker = clumsy
Wazzock = a slow, dumb friend 
I feel so much smarter already.
Also, I kind of suspect that Sam (British RA) is making this up to fool me into thinking I know cool British slang.

My Assimilation into English Culture:

Some foreign student asked me for directions yesterday! I obviously looked like I knew what I was doing. Then I proceeded to take the longest possible way to the English Faculty Library, adding like a mile and half to my route. I'm getting there.

My Exciting Day:

Today was basically the best day ever. Let me give you some reasons:

1. Sunshine. Believe me, this is a big deal.
2. I went to my first lectures today: "God, Christ, and Salvation," "Doctrines of Salvation," and a general literature one. Brilliant. You know you are in an Oxford lecture when there is a glass bottle of sparkling water for the lecturer at the front of the room. 
3. We had America night for my food group tonight. Let me be more specific: we had AMURICA night for my food group. Burgers and fries, of course. And ice cream. Since Sam is in our food group, we made him talk in an "American" accent the whole time. He made a good attempt, but it was more Irish/Southern, and at like an octive up from his normal voice. Of course, we talked only about America and how great it was. Some things we listed:  Freedom, processed cheese, good water pressure, going to the moon, Taco Bell, snow, superheros, and guns. In exchange, we told Sam we would have British night where we all talk in English accents and he tells us how great England is. There is no way it can compare.

This post is now insanely long, but one more thing: only YOU can help come up with a better name for this blog. So please, come up with a better name.

First tutorial is on Friday!

Historic First Post

Hello friends,

First of all: I apologize for A) the lame title and B) the lame layout. The first one is because I'm not creative and the second because I accidentally clicked through the "make your blog pretty" section, so I got stuck with a really boring template. Bummer dude.

Now, more exciting stuff! Hey, guess what, I'm in Oxford! This city is beautiful, which you can't really tell from my rainy pictures:

This is the most adorable pub in the world:

This is one of the beautiful libraries where I get to study ALL THE TIME:

I live in a nice little house on Crick Road, about a mile from downtown Oxford. About 20 of the Scholarship and Christianity in Oxford (SCIO) students live here. My roomies are Annie, Monica, and Elane, who are pretty cool cats. This house is clearly awesome, as evidenced by the picture from the kitchen below:

 Although it was a little disappointing to find out we don't have house elves, not gonna lie.

My Best English Find So Far: Man-Size Kleenex. I am not even kidding, these were actually labeled "man-size" and the obvious question is WHY DO WE NOT HAVE THESE IN AMERICA?

My Favorite English Expressions Thus Far:
 First of all, my British Junior Dean (pretty much my R.A. for my building), told me that no one says "Tally Ho," or "Pip Pip Cheerio," 'except ironically." That was pretty much devastating to hear. Luckily for me, British people say lots of other funny things.
1. Starting everything with "do." Like "Do sit down" or "Do read it through." These British are very affirmative.
2. I completely forgot the other thing I was going to say. I blame jet-leg. Don't worry, though, they do say funny stuff, and I will document it whenever I actually remember it.

So in this crazy British educational system, we have primary and secondary tutorials. My secondary tutorial is "C. S. Lewis in Context," which should be pretty cool, especially since I'm IN Oxford and walk past the Eagle and Child everyday. My first tutorial was supposed to be "Theology of Martin Luther," but the professor who was supposed to do it is apparently on sabbatical. After Jake's tutor got deported (seriously), we were wondering what Oxford had against Trinity students. But good news! Jake has a new tutor, and I'm either supposed to get one for Luther by tomorrow or I'll switch to a Bonhoeffer tutorial. So, Joy, bonus, I already have lots of nicknames lined up for him.

We've been doing orientation all week and I think I'm thoroughly orientated now. This is what I have learned:

• Your tutors won't like your first essay. They may not like any of your essays. If they do, they probably won't tell you.
• Even though they tell you there is absolutely NO WAY you can switch your tutorial because they were set up in November, you may not have a primary tutor yet.
• English people walk fast. And their children are adorable.
• English food is gross. 

These are all worthwhile lessons, but I'm ready to move on to next week, which is the first week of term! (Gasp.)
Saturday we're all going to London, so I know you'll be eagerly anticipating my next post with London updates!